taxi cab confessions

wednesday morning. i jumped out of bed @ 9a.m. tired, exhausted, and sleep deprived. got dressed, brushed my teeth, ate my oatmeal, and poured myself a large cup of coffee…to go. out the door by 9:30a.m. not too bad…but still running pretty late. unacceptable. too tired to walk the fifteen minute walk to the subway hop on and hop back off five stops later and walk an additional six blocks to work. not short blocks. long ones. total estimated time: 45 minutes. why not take a taxi, i thought. i wasn’t thinking. i opted for a quick cabbie ride. total estimated time: 20 minutes (give or take with traffic).

after approximately five minutes of standing around and sipping on my coffee, i finally hailed a cab. spotting a cab with its lights on and not off duty, is like winning the lottery. dramatic? yes. cabs in new york, despite what one may think, aren’t that easy to come by. so, you can imagine how happy I was to finally pin one down. i jumped in.

“57th and 10th please.” off we went.

the driver was a nice, algerian man. we didn’t chat much. i was too busy updating my facebook status. as we approached 23rd and 10th, I heard a siren go off. music to my ears. the cabbie pulled over. a chubby, short bald man approached the driver’s window. i was slightly confused. he wasn’t wearing a uniform..no badge..i don’t think he even had a gun. he sort of resembled michael chiklis. you know, the guy from the shield.

officer-“i need your driver’s license”

cabbie- “i don’t have it.”

i thought, shit. here we go. should I get out now and avoid this disaster? things could get out of hand. i’m laaaaaaaaaaaaaate!

officer- “you don’t have a ny driver’s license? that’s illegal. do you have a hack license?”

what’s a hack license, i thought? too late to get out. i was stuck. nowhere to move.

cabbie- “yes.”

phewwww. thank god.

officer-“you can’t just go around cutting people off with no signal” (officer walks away and goes to his tinted black impala. not even a police car. suspect.)

that’s what cab drivers do. it’s their specialty. cutting people off. it’s a craft.

9:50a.m…chiklis returned and gave back the hack license to the driver.

officer- “because she is in the car (looks at me) i won’t give you the ticket.”

how nice officer, thank you. i’m still late to work. the driver took off and immediately started cursing out loud. i was consoling the cabbie. “it’s okay. it’s not your fault, blah blah blah.” all i was thinking was, get me where i need to go…i’m laaaaaate!

finally got to work. five minutes late. no one noticed. i think i’ll just walk from now on. i'm not taking any chances.